Jump to content

"Who am I" vs. "What steps do I want to take"


Guest

Recommended Posts

Hi all, hope you're doing well.

I've been thinking about gender a lot and wanted to share some revelations I'm finally able to put into words. (Disclaimer: This is by no means everyone's experience, this is just mine and my thoughts on it. There are many valid ways to question and label oneself.)

I've struggled with finding a label to describe my gender for many years. I felt very pressured to have a label, and this caused me some distress. I realized though that gender, regardless of whether one is cis or trans or in between, could be less about having an exact label and more about what steps you find helpful to take. No judgement at all to those who like labels; I realize it brings joy to many and that is totally cool! It just wasn't the case for me for a while, and if it's not the case for you too, that's okay. I found it helpful to focus on what I actually wanted to do with my gender identity and expression. For example, asking myself "Do I want to go by different pronouns? A different name? Do I want to medically transition?" was immensely more helpful in understanding myself (and thus deriving a label) as opposed to starting right off the bat with the big question of "what am I?" 

Idk, I just found this cool and wanted to share. I'm sure stuff like this is floating around out there but I just wanted to add my thoughts to it.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

The task of defining who I will be five years from now is way too intimidating for me to tackle, so I've been working on who I want to be next year. I can commit to making changes that will (hopefully) improve my life next year without taking on the expectations of committing to binary transition or passing.

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • 2 weeks later...
On 4/8/2023 at 5:32 PM, Fox said:

Hi all, hope you're doing well.

I've been thinking about gender a lot and wanted to share some revelations I'm finally able to put into words. (Disclaimer: This is by no means everyone's experience, this is just mine and my thoughts on it. There are many valid ways to question and label oneself.)

I've struggled with finding a label to describe my gender for many years. I felt very pressured to have a label, and this caused me some distress. I realized though that gender, regardless of whether one is cis or trans or in between, could be less about having an exact label and more about what steps you find helpful to take. No judgement at all to those who like labels; I realize it brings joy to many and that is totally cool! It just wasn't the case for me for a while, and if it's not the case for you too, that's okay. I found it helpful to focus on what I actually wanted to do with my gender identity and expression. For example, asking myself "Do I want to go by different pronouns? A different name? Do I want to medically transition?" was immensely more helpful in understanding myself (and thus deriving a label) as opposed to starting right off the bat with the big question of "what am I?" 

Idk, I just found this cool and wanted to share. I'm sure stuff like this is floating around out there but I just wanted to add my thoughts to it.

This was really helpful.

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

×
×
  • Create New...